Our inner child and how it impacts our love life
Come listen to the work that has had the most impact on me finding love and experiencing a healthy relationship.
In this webinar, I discuss:
- Examples of how our inner child impacts who we attract and the dating cycles we experience
- How our inner child gets formed
- How to detect various components of your inner child
- How to heal your inner child
- And how to apply this work in our everyday life, including in dating and relationships
If you are ever triggered or activated when relating with someone, chances are your inner child is running the show. Becoming aware of when you keep reliving the past through these triggers in your current life can give you the tools to respond from your adult self, which is necessary for connection, rather than reacting from a past self.
Your inner child does not only get developed in childhood, but you could be keeping relaying out patterns from your past in multiple stages of your life (wounds from your teen years, coping mechanisms from past relationships, or other patterns that were created from any other previous moment in time).
“I give you my step-by-step process to uncover these patterns and wounds and start healing them on your own so that you can start attracting and experiencing what you want in your relationships, instead of staying stuck in the same dating and relationship ruts and cycles you’ve grown used to.”
Examples of how your inner child impacts who you attract and the dating cycles you experience
- Example #1
The inner child: A child had parents who worked very long hours. Every time she finally got the attention of a parent, she would feel special and loved. In dating, she unconsciously attracted guys who were the life of the party and whose attention everyone wanted. Whenever they chose to give their attention to her, she felt special and loved, and thought it meant they had chemistry.
The work: We worked together to determine traits in a partner that would bring for a compatible and fulfilling relationship, not ones that simply replayed this familiar dynamic but left her unhappy and unfulfilled. She learned how to detect when she was triggered by these familiar feelings and calm her inner child so that her adult self could take over and start making her dating decisions for her instead.
- Example #2
The inner child: A child had a mom that had a temper and would get really angry. After she would storm off, the mom would never have a repair conversation with her daughter so that the daughter knew where she stood or if things were okay. In her romantic relationships, whenever someone got angry, she feared they might leave. Her abandonment fear prompted her to seek validation to know that they would stay. She sought it in ways that ultimately pushed her partners away.
The work: When her inner child was triggered due to someone getting angry or expressing disappointment, she learned to love on her inner child and give herself validation. Here, she would reach a state where she was no longer needing external validation to know her worthiness. She learned people can get angry and not leave. But if they did, she would also be safe and have her own back. She was able to calm herself in those moments and not badger her partners to know where they stood. She was finally able to form a secure connection with a partner.
- Example #3
The inner child: This child had a father who would take what she would tell him in confidence and use it against her and her mother. Her inner child learned that you cannot trust people. She struggled to create authentic relationships with romantic partners because she didn’t trust potential partners with her vulnerability. If she ever got to a stage where guys would get close, she would unconsciously find something wrong with them and move on.
The work: She learned to detect when her inner child would get triggered by situations with men that meant she would have to be vulnerable and potentially get rejected, hurt or betrayed. She showed her inner child compassion and taught her that she could trust her adult self to keep her safe from harm. She slowly started to take small risks to be vulnerable and prove to her inner child that she was trustworthy. She opened up to more and more partners and found that guys pleasantly surprised her, she had more in common with them than she thought, and they could be trusted.
