Are men giving you the disclaimer? If so, it means that he’s giving you a warning that he doesn’t anticipate being able to show up for you in the way that you want him to.
He does this so that if you decide to stick around anyway, he doesn’t have to feel guilty if you get hurt because he warned you. You decided to take the risk anyway, so now it’s on you.
For some men, the disclaimer can sounds like:
- I’m not looking for something long term
- I’m not looking for commitment
- I’m just having fun and if something happens it happens
- I’m not ready for commitment
- I don’t know what I want
- I have no business being in a relationship
- I’m focusing on my career right now
- I have too much going on in my life to think about a relationship
- I just got out of a relationship so I’m not trying to rush into anything
- I’m broken
- You deserve better than me
- I don’t want you to get hurt
It’s all just the disclaimer.
He’s essentially saying, “you’re wanting more and I’m feeling protective and I have to be careful.” Meaning… he doesn’t want to hurt you because he knows he can’t provide what you want.
If anything, it is a sign of respect. He knows you are a high-quality woman that has intentions of something serious (or deserves it) and he knows he can’t (or doesn’t want to) provide that to you. And he doesn’t want to feel guilty for wasting your time. Perhaps with a less quality woman, he would just go on, without saying anything. But with you, he thinks you deserve the respect of a warning.
Don’t take any disclaimer from a man personally and make it mean something about you. He just can’t give you (or likely, anyone) what you need given where he is in his life right now. He just isn’t your guy.
Keep your standards high. Be cautiously optimistic while dating. Make them earn your time, attention, and commitment. Your guy will love that you know what you want and that you’re not willing to settle for anything less.
If he is your guy, he will do what he needs to do in order to make you his. So be real, authentic and clear about wanting something real. It sends a signal that you are a woman of worth.
And also, you can’t say or do the wrong thing with the right guy. So you might as well go for it. ♥️
If you want help attracting higher quality guys, or getting to the commitment stage with them, this is exactly what I help my clients with.
We will uncover all of the blocks getting in your way of attracting the love life you want, and correct them, so you can finally get into the relationship you’re meant for.
Sign up for a consult call and let’s start coaching today!